The Stereotype Lounge, 6, 7,8

A day of auditions began at 6:30 this AM in which I trudged down to Equity to stand in line for a chance to warble at an EPA (Equity Principal Audition (in other words, if you're wanting a big part,)), where you sit until 9 am when the monitors start to sign people up for a three minute slot in which you can do anything at all. The line snaked through the entire building and ended in a large studio. A large, resonant studio that quickly began to fill to capacity.
Lucky me, I was sandwiched between two theatah types that are the reason the Apple gods created iPods.
One; the scarf-wearing, tea-drinking HUMMER who feels the need to warm up in front of all the other jaded hopefuls and two; the loud-talking, regional theatre socialite who--in the guise of a salutation, always steers the banter back to him/her (in this case him)-self with a few quick, unsuspected fishtails that generally involve the verbal opening gambit, "How ARE yooooooou?!?!?!? OOOooooohMyGoshIHaven'tSeenYouInSoLOOOOOOOOOOONG!!!! (insert chirpy jumps and hand clapping or (if you're across the room) the toddler wave) OhMyGOOOOD, you look GREAAAAAT! OhMyGod!!!! Your BUTT is sooooooo CUUUUUUTE in those JEANS!!!!! So--Are you working??? Well, IIIIII'm doing a showcase that's me I perfect Casting for a film, me. I just think that I am SO right for the me I perfect aaaaand you KNOW... me perfect high b flat me, that I just perfect soooo me me me me"... ad nauseum.
All this delight in a room in which Helen Keller can hear you change your mind.

I just sat there feeling forty. Forty... FOUR OH... Okay... Four THREE in this case... but I rounded down.
Forty. It's the new black.
Or as my friend calls it, "the age when you don't have to do what you don't want to do and you don't have to offer an explanation".
I'll drink to that.

At any rate, the line began it's slow, inexorable wind through the Family Reunion of everyone you have ever loved/hated/screwed/been screwed over by/dodged/adored/despised/obsessed over/stalked/been stalked by and are now fatter/thinner/older than (okaaaaaaaaay, The Equity Lounge) herded and shushed by a nice, but slightly stressed-out monitor, to the table where I was told at long last that... all the times were taken and there were only alternate positions left. Lovely...

Couldn't do that, because I had a commercial (I, me) audition across town. Thankfully, that seemed to go extremely well... But it's mornings such as these that make me consistently reassure myself that I should not chuck it all and move to Saugerties to grow vegetables and become a hippie.
... Again.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not knocking that life. I love it up there, but it still feels as if there are a few things left to do. Here.

Like buy really powerful earphones...